Yvette Nicole Brown wrote this joke based on actual experience with directors who didn’t want to use the word “sassy” but 100% wanted her to play it sassier.
so there was a bug in my room so i got my mom to kill it because i hate bugs and then she was like
"you have to learn to kill bugs for your girlfriend"
and i was like
"ill get my boyfriend to do it"
and thats how i came out to my mom
Mark Ruffalo, eating Ruffles on a Buffalo
Stop faking your fucking orgasms. Society already tells young men that they run the fucking universe - if they can’t turn your cunt into a shooting star then for god’s sake, let them know about it.
- Gf: babe come over
- Me: I'm eating garlic bread
- Gf: I'm horny and my parents aren't home
- Me: it's the kind that's covered in cheese
me as a parent
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